Some, not all. And who I stay in touch with changes over time. I have many aunts, uncles, cousins and the next 2 generations so it isn’t possible to keep meaningfully in touch with everyone. We have a pretty good grapevine so information eventually filters through.

I attended a funeral this week and all I can say is I have some regrets, imperfect though they were

things are hard, it’s not always possible, amd people are complex, but it’s good to still try

Yeah we see them every year or so, more my dad’s side, they came over last year as a surprise birthday visit for my dad. My mum’s brothers don’t usually come down to our area cause she moved away in the first place. And we don’t go up there as often since Grandma died.

Cousins in my age group once every few months maybe, aunts and uncles hardly ever. Not even my own all that frequently, but we have a whatsapp group with those and my parents where we chat somewhat frequently.

nope. they pretty much didn’t give a shit about me until they learned I was somewhat successful and had kids, then they wanted to be involved in my family.

no birthday cards, no wedding invitations, nothing. then bam, once they all started to get old enough to start dying they wanted to reach out and be family again.

not just that they ruined a particularly fond memory I had as a child and I never forgave them for it.

fuck em. they’re just strangers to me by now anyway. I wish them the best in life but have no desire to include them in my life.

I have tried. They seem to think it’s weird. Oh well, family gatherings happen often enough, and there’s other legit excuses sometimes.

No. I moved around a lot as a kid, and we’re all scattered around the country at this point.

Not a ton, but I do talk to one great uncle occasionally. And a great aunt (her late husband was the great uncle’s older brother). Come to think of it, several second cousins, too. We don’t talk a ton, but we do voluntarily see each other beyond the “family weddings and funerals” rotation.

I have some contact with my siblings but pretty much only see most people once a year for holidays. I could do without the holidays, honestly.

My mom has a scheduled video conference call with my siblings and I every few weeks, so we stay in pretty good contact that way. We also all get along pretty well. Family is spread out halfway across the States, so getting together in person is a bit tricky.

I see my sister who lives nearby every few months (generally when our parents come through), and one brother roughly once a year; other brother is farther away and harder to get together with.

Cousins, aunts, and uncles are rarer, even though they’re closer. Think the last time I saw any of them was at a funeral.

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I have a couple of aunts that I can have deep conversations with. I also get along with some of my cousins. I’ll say that my family isn’t as hierarchical as other families are.

The last line makes it sound a lot more like social anxiety than introversion.

My parents moved away from both their extended families so I only met each side once at like family reunions.

So it’s me, twin, and mother out here in the area. I think mother keeps up with some of the 36 other cousins on her level of the family. I think twin vaguely knows what dad’s brother is up to (hiding in the woods)

We have an unholy amount of second cousins, twice removed cousins, but they’re all far away.

No. All are dyed in the wool trumpers these days and didn’t do jack shit for me in younger years in the midst of very hard times of family problems (eg, parental divorce).

I have my true family and loved ones, and would rather not complicate things. I’ve already spent hundreds of thousands of words mending one close relationship successfully; but that was one worth saving as taxing as it was.

As far as older people go you mention, the funny thing is I’ve always been more comfortable around people much older than me. Always felt distant from my peers, generally.