They call it a common gesture of courtesy to inform people that your home would offer itself to those fleeing some kind of devastation (oppressive regimes, abuse, earthquakes, etc.). However, most people don’t end up in that kind of humanitarian role. What’s the closest you have come?
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For me, the closest was volunteering at a local non-profit that provides temporary housing to immigrants who are released from the local detention center and may not even know where the hell they are. They bus them in from Texas (we are in Colorado) and detain them here. Casa de Paz is the name of the non-profit in case anyone feels generous. They do amazing work and provide much-needed services and tons of empathy for the people they serve.
Hosted refugees.
When Russia’s full scale invasion of Ukraine started in late feb 2022 we (Swedes) watched in horror as the people walked for days to get to southern Poland where the towns quickly tried to set them up with tents and basic services, looking for ways they could then move on within the EU.
My wife took the decision that she wanted to help, in any way possible, and jumped in the car. She drove for 14 hours, slept in the car, picked up two families (mother/daughters) and brought them back here to Sweden. One of them we then housed in our guest house for a year before they decided that it was safe “enough” for them to move back to their home town.
We had the opportunity and possibility. Not everyone has, the important part is to act in any way you can.
My mother used to volunteer to help a family of Kurds set up their life in Germany. Last I heard they started their own business. They still keep in touch.
My son helped organise a donation collection for Ukrainian refugees that arrived in our town.
I let my cousin stay a week with me when his wife kicked him out.
closest was two Belgian travelers who were SOL and money in Beijing, so I let them crash in an unused classroom for a few days in my school and take showers and wash everything in the staff bathroom and they were real happy.
I registered as an auntie on r/auntienetwork. Haven’t been needed in that capacity yet, but my door is open. Speaking of… is there a similar community here? If not, would there be an interest in spinning something like that up?
I don’t know about general interest, but I think it’s smart. Maybe ask for a consensus in the new dad for a minute com? There might be more interest there
I think it was in the late 90s when a vicious ice storm took out power lines everywhere and the whole downtown core was plunged into darkness for the better part of a month. Fortunately, out where we lived in the suburbs, the power mostly ran underground and was restored pretty quick.
But then my wife got a panicked call from a distant relative who said she couldn’t reach her daughter studying at the university and could we look in on her? So we found her and offered her the guest bedroom for as long as she needed it.
At first, it seemed to be working out? Then it began to emerge that she was some sort of evangelical Christian who was frustrated that we were not eager to convert. I sort of thought taking in a refugee was a fairly Christian thing to do, but whatever.
Eventually, she demanded I take her back to the dorm. I told her downtown is still dark and cold, but she said “I don’t care. You guys are so boring!” So I carefully drove her back around downed trees and power lines and dropped her off.
I felt pretty bad about it and we prayed she’d be ok. A couple of weeks later, the relative called again and thanked us so much for taking care of her daughter and that we went way beyond the call despite how things turned out.
I’m a millennial, I’ve been on the verge of homelessness myself my entire adulthood. In my adult life a full time job at minimum wage has never been enough to rent a studio apartment nearly anywhere in the country. Not once in my life have I have enough to really live on my own, have a choice about where I live, or didn’t have raising rents pushing me to move elsewhere. I doubt I’m the only one who has had such deep lack of stability that the idea of hosting refugees (or anyone else for that matter) has been purely a fucking pipe dream.
That being said, I have dreamed of being able to take care of those I know who are struggling, but I have been denied every opportunity due to struggling myself.
Tbh your situation is probably worse than being homeless. So consider how impossible it is to drop further, and use that as an opportunity to do something exceptional. I’d gladly live in my car or in a tent before I’d work two minimum wage jobs. At least then I could go to a library and read all day, develop a skill, or idk, become a monk, a survivalist, a revolutionary, a nomad, or whatever. Much better than being a slave.
We allowed a young Arab man to stay with us over Christmas. He’d spent a year in our town aged 8 and had returned aged 21 to revisit his old school friends, most of whom had forgotten him and didn’t trust his unsolicited FB messages. He arrived on Christmas Eve and was staying in a B&B when we agreed to meet him in a coffee shop. Needless to say, he ended up living at our place for a fortnight before he went home. Over the next decade, he popped over for a visit every few years and we went to Egypt a couple of times. Sadly he was born with a congenital heart defect and died a while ago now, leaving a wife and daughter. We are still in contact with his family.
Back in 2022, we nearly agreed to host a Ukrainian refugee (there’s a Government scheme to arrange this) but we were downsizing to a different part of the UK and so it became unfeasible.
My brother-in-law lived with us for 6 months after his divorce 20 years or so ago. That period was quite trying.
After hurricane Maria devastated Puerto Rico a friend posted on social media asking if anyone could house his friend from San Juan. I was living in a house Brooklyn and I volunteered. His name was Robert and he was a really great dude. I really enjoyed hanging out with while he stayed. I told him he could stay as long as he wanted. He was such a boss that he had a chef job and his own New York apartment within two weeks.
My partner and I have hosted many many people through our home(s) in various states of flourishing or floundering. We recently had one of our best friends commit suicide, after they came to stay with us from having a previous attempt. That was january(link). I wish we could have done so much more. We also caught the falling knives of spousal abuse, homelessness, extreme PTSD (like relationship ending bad, from their time in Iraq).
We’ve made it known to some of our circles that if need be, that we will shelter them with no questions asked, even if that means breaking the law. This includes lgbt+, greencard and other visa holders, including certain middle eastern identities that are being particularly targeted at the moment, and especially them because we know they are going to be directly targeted. We’ll probably become targeted ourselves, primarily because of our roles in science and politics, but eh. Can’t be helped.
We don’t have a choice other than to be better people than we were raised by this society to be in this moment. We had the grace of time to prepare for this moment and we gave the reigns to feckless and worthless tenders. We’re all suffering the failure of that moment, the moment where the American people needed to demand better from their political estate and chose not to.
But here we are. Ours is not to question why, ours is but to do or die.
Room-mates with a Lebanese refugee for 7 years. Good guy, went to his wedding, he came to mine.
I sent in multiple google forms to the group coordinating Ukrainian refugees in my vicinity when they put out calls for housing. I didn’t hear back from them any of the times, I may have been too rural for it to be viable.
Moved out of our apt and put it up for rent fully furnished.
