Give consentual pets.

I have ADHD and for me there is only joy or great missery

Never felt any impetus to drink, and I have a personal aversion to recreational drugs.

Without thinking too hard about it, I probably get the most joy from learning stuff, especially when it’s within a topic of interest and has any level of application to my interests or skills. Bonus points when I make the connection myself.

I see other comments mentioning ADHD, so I’ll add that I have a diagnosis for it as well.

Good question, though. It’s been a while since I asked myself this, and I’m overdue for a reassessment. Thanks.

I like growing and tending to plants, painting miniatures, and working on DnD projects. All of these also generate a physical, tangible thing which is also nice (though I really wish I could use the DnD stuff more.)

I don’t drink or weed.

joy is fleeting.

rage is eternal.

accept the rage, become the rage.

Honestly breaks from instant excitement. Spending some time coding, making soap, fixing up the house. If I spend three days boozing, playing games, watching shows, etc I’ll be fucking wiped and spend some time just feeling like death afterwords.

If I instead stick to things that require some choring to get to the yippy stage I find I’m just more content.

Take a month off the chems and exercise regularly during that time

Sounds like you should be sober from weed too.

If your default state is high, you’re never sober. You’re just experiencing the hangover state between highs. Think of it as the weed version of delerium to an alchoholic. It’s not a physical hangover, so it’s not as obvious.

Stay sober for a few weeks. It’ll drag at first, but it’ll go away after a bit. You’ll even out your neurotransmitters and feel like yourself again. Then getting high on occasion will be an event, not a medication.

Anecdotally, people I’ve known who smoke everyday tend to be okay with things they shouldn’t be. The chemical joy seems to make them content with having a kind of shitty life and never actually doing anything. High activities just became their only activities when weed changed from weekends to everyday. I’m not saying this is true of everyone, but I’ve seen it happen more often than not to daily smokers.

Drugs and alcohol should be occasional modifiers to your life, not the default state. Give your chemistry a rest.

Alcohol only gives you empty calories which fills your belly unnecessarily. So I drink it seldom, and tbh I still not get used for that burning tasteless liquid

Was a daily smoker for almost two decades and would defend my usage to anyone who suggested it could be a source of discontent in my life. I kicked the booze habit 10 years ago, kicked nicotine a few years after that, but held onto bud for a long time.

I’m almost 4 months sober now from thc and, while the first 1.5 months were shit cause of sleep issues and general system regulation, I’m so happy to be on the other side of it. It started out as tea break, I had some projects I kept putting off and thought I could reset my tolerance and get some motivation at the same time. But now that I’m several months deep, I’m not going back. My life has improved so much, in both minor and major ways.

Every person is different and it’s not my place to tell anyone what they should or shouldn’t do regarding substance intake. All I can say is, as someone who was dedicated to a substance supported existence for the majority of my adult life, I am definitely, without a doubt, my best self as a sober human.

I drink alcohol maybe once per year and I’ve never touched weed. I feel joy when I am around people and animals whom I love.

It’s going to get worse before it gets better. But it’s worth it.

Exercise & fresh air & sunshine & nutritious food. As a bonus, it costs nothing! Aside from the cost of food which we all need anyway, so might as well spend our money on healthy food instead of the other options.

Off the top of my head, here are a few of the things that gave me joy this week…

OMG kitty!
Hey, it’s my awesome wife!
Yay, video games!
This burger tastes amazing!
Damn this chair is comfy.
Boobies!!!
I made someone smile today!
It’s a beautiful day for a bike ride!
Did I mention the kitty?
Farts are funny, I didn’t care how old I am.
I made friends with my new neighbors dog!

If you aren’t getting at least a little bit of joy from life, you probably need to see someone about depression.

The most common way for me is with music, sometimes a song hits just right and it’s amazing. Doesn’t have to be a happy song to make me feel happy, just has to be the right song.