I (23M) am a broke online college student living with my parents. I have an abusive brother (25M) who also lives under the same roof.
My brother is a narcissist. He believes that he is the most important person in the universe. Boundaries and respect do not matter to him. He will hijack every conversation into being either constant self-aggrandizing or personal attacks and force me to repeat it back to him. He is physically violent when provoked and he has killed multiple animals by beating them to death with his bare hands. Unfortunately, he seems to consider “no” to be a provocation. He searches through all my stuff without permission and I’ve had to start being careful about what things I leave lying around.
My parents do not care about this. My father doesn’t because he’s the OG narcissist who passed it down to my brother and actively cheers for my suffering, and my mother doesn’t because she is the enabler who chose to stay married to my father and told me I had to suffer the abuse endlessly like she does.
I don’t have any irl friends because I have medical conditions that make it difficult for me to be outside on my own for extended periods of time. I also can’t drive because of that. It sucks. This isn’t to say it’s impossible for me to go out, but it’s hard and kind of risky (my condition can cause me to faint).
I have constantly been told to give up on being treated like a human being, but I have begun to recognize that my family is feeding me false narratives of hopelessness to keep me complacent and submissive. I surely have power, but my internalization of their narratives is obscuring the ways to exercise it.
What would you do in such a situation, or if you have been in a similar situation, what did you do?
EDIT: I live in the U.S.
this is a story that is common in many subs on. does your parent see him as a golden child. they often neglect the other child, and when things get bad, usually financially for the parents because they gave all thier money to said golden child and he mismanages the funds.
him killing animals is a sure sign of sociapathic/psychopathic tendacies, its only matter of time before you or your parents will be the next target(s).
it seems like the parents want to keep you in the house to truncate some of the brothers anger and violence towards you instead of them.
are you going to college? if so there are scholarships that can assist with living in dorm, or a off campus apartment. at least my state school has an offcampus apartments that they own, usually only for universities/state uni.
eventually the parents are going to rely on yuo financially or otherwise to offset thier retirement, if your bro doesnt harm them first. this only ends poorly.
He’s definitely the golden child. There’s an illusion of fairness, but I am viewed far less favorably than he is despite his numerous crimes and transgressions. They are usually spread far enough apart that things “reset” and I seem to be the only one who understands how messed up he is. Nothing sticks to him. He his held in positive regard no matter what he does, and I am held in negative regard no matter what I do.
I am doing online college because it’s cheaper than in-person. I am worried about accruing too much debt because I am anxious about my ability to pay it off in the future.