• TauZero@mander.xyz
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    11 days ago

    Bidet - don’t need any fancy standalone appliance, just a $50 nozzle that goes under the toilet seat and plugs into the water hose. Haven’t paid a penny for toilet paper in 6 years.

      • TauZero@mander.xyz
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        11 days ago

        You’d think so! right? But instead it is the idea of smearing shit on your ass with your fingers and a piece of paper that now sounds uncomfortable to me. This is the “completely changed your life” element of it. I’ve been using paper for decades no problem, but now I hate pooping outside of home because there is no bidet there. Beware!

      • thermal_shock@lemmy.world
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        11 days ago

        Do some research man, you let the dog lick it until it’s dry enough. If not, clap them cheeks dry.

      • bamboo@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        11 days ago

        Maybe they have a fancy bidet with a blower? Or they horded toilet paper during COVID and are working through the surplus? You do pretty much have to dry somehow, but the amount of TP needed to dry a wet asshole is significantly less than cleaning a shitty asshole.

      • BurgerBaron@piefed.social
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        9 days ago

        I use a small amount of toilet paper to pat dry myself.

        Wiping shitty ass with dry paper leads to micro tears and hemorrhoids.

        • WoodScientist@lemmy.world
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          9 days ago

          One further benefit is that it allows you to optimize what little toilet paper you do buy towards strength. Normally there’s a tradeoff. Softer and less abrasive toilet paper is nicer on the bum, but it comes apart more easily. It can leave bits of toilet paper dust around and even tear at the most inopportune time. But if you’re only using a little to dry off, you can buy the strongest stuff you can find, regardless of how harsh it might be to use as regular dry wiping paper. Who cares if it feels like sandpaper if you’re just using it to pat yourself dry?

    • FaceDeer@fedia.io
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      10 days ago

      Heh, thirding bidet. I’m still working through the stock of toilet paper I bought as a joke when Covid first hit and everyone was panicking about toilet paper, I bought the bidet right after that and realized I’d be taking a looong time getting through that.

      It’s handy for lots of other stuff too, if I ever need to quickly rinse something the bathtub’s right next to the toilet so I can hold it there and give it a blast.

      • datavoid@sh.itjust.works
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        10 days ago

        I remember back when people were posting pictures to shame the idiots at Costco who were panicking and buying all the toilet paper before anyone else could…

        What I’m trying to say is that’s a “hilarious” joke!

    • BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today
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      9 days ago

      Mine was less than $30, installed easily in 20 minutes with a single wrench, and has worked flawlessly for years. Changes your life for the better every single day.