• rumba@lemmy.zip
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    1 day ago

    The younger kid’s chat is disabled. not allowed to friend anyone.

    The older kid has chat enabled, but is only allowed to friend people we vet.

    Computers are in an open area, chats have been keylogged, we check occasionally.

    If friends show up unanounced, or they chat where they’re not supposed to, they lose internet access long enough to regret it

    When they get old enough to have friends online, we contact the parents, make sure they’re compatible politically, theologogically, just generally not extremists and their kids have some base level of dicipline and are safety minded.

    We also semi-regularly play with them and set rules about the appropriateness of the games in relation to the kids ages. The younger one’s don’t get to play the violent ones.

    • NotANumber@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      19 hours ago

      Making sure the parents of your kids friends are compatible politically and theologically sounds incredibly dodgy to me.

      I will say this as well: strict parents raise sneaky children

      • rumba@lemmy.zip
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        14 hours ago

        Not from a multi-race household I see.

        If little Timmy’s parents start talking about “those kids” my kids isn’t playing with him. Too many racist fucks out there.

        • NotANumber@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          10 hours ago

          If you meant racism you should have said that. Saying politically and theologically compatible implies a lot more than that. In fact it implies they have to be the same religion, which is being bigoted in itself.

    • Dozzi92@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Crazy, but it’s almost like parenting can make the environment safer!

      Lemmy likes to portray Roblox the same way the 10pm news portrayed the Internet when I was in my preteens and teen years, like it was the wild west, everyone was a predator, etc. I let my kids hop on. Their friends include me, their mom (who has an account for some reason), each other, and the kids who live across the street. They like to play the platformers, and they invite me sometimes and we play them.

      They’ll get older and they’ll go explore the internet the same way I did. I spent my adolescence and teen years eventually in AIM chat rooms, then forums, and thn Skyping random people, and somehow didn’t become a terrorist, didn’t get predated. I also am of the school of thought that you need to learn things on your own, rather than have no exposure to things that could potentially be bad.

      • w3dd1e@lemmy.zip
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        20 hours ago

        Also, I did grow up with AIM and all that nonsense and I did get predators talking to me constantly, especially on AOL and Yahoo. Crazy that we had such different experiences during that age.

      • w3dd1e@lemmy.zip
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        20 hours ago

        Yeah. I wouldn’t let my kids in Roblox personally bc of how the company has tried to ignore the problem . if parents just took time to understand it and talk to their kids about safety, it would solve many problems, not just in Roblox.

      • Grendel@tiny.tilde.website
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        19 hours ago

        @Dozzi92
        it’s also important to remember that different kids have different needs. Some kids can handle it fine, others may be more at risk due to past trauma or developmental delays.

        I do agree it’s all about teaching them safety and guiding them rather than forever sheltering them.

        What’s most dangerous is completely leaving them to fend for themselves.
        @rumba

      • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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        23 hours ago

        Crazy, but it’s almost like parenting can make the environment safer!

        NOooooooooooo!!! We need the gubmint to impose stupid laws to protect teh children!!!

    • w3dd1e@lemmy.zip
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      20 hours ago

      Bc of what I went through with my ex’s kid, I talk help parents talk to kids about online safety. It’s good that you are so proactive!

      The #1 thing I see parents miss in those safety talks is coming up with a plan when something bad happens so kids know what to do.

      I spoke to my 14 year old niece last weekend. She wants to use Snapchat but her parents said no. I asked her what she would do if she got a dick pick from a stranger. I asked her what she would do if her boyfriend sent her one. Various situations like that.

      She didn’t know what to do, so together, we came up with a plan and identified an adult in her life that she would feel comfortable talking to that isn’t her parents. A third part adult that you and your kid can trust is helpful for kids that are afraid to talk to their parents and get grounded.

      For example: if your kid is online after they got grounded and something bad happened, they might be afraid to tell you since they weren’t suppose to be online, but maybe they’ll be okay speaking to an aunt or uncle.

      Every situation is different

      • rumba@lemmy.zip
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        14 hours ago

        Damn good points.

        Youngest is younger that. I’m just not letting him chat until he’s a teen

        Eldest has had all the appropriate talks before he got on discord.

      • Grendel@tiny.tilde.website
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        19 hours ago

        @W3dd1e
        @rumba

        I have spoken to multiple parents about how dangerous this “game” is.

        I tell them that I’d let my kids walk across times square in NYC alone before I’d let them play Roblox.

        Honestly times square is pretty safe these days, but it seems to be an effective analogy to other parents emphasizing the kind of danger that roblox presents.

    • SorryQuick@lemmy.ca
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      17 hours ago

      we contact the parents, make sure they’re compatible politically, theologogically

      This is insane. You call that kid’s mom to ask who she votes for and what name she uses for god, and if it doesn’t match yours, kids can’t have fun?

      • rumba@lemmy.zip
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        14 hours ago

        We have a 15 minute conversation to find out if they’re batshit crazy slur calling racist trumpeters because we dont need to subject our kids to that shit.

        I find it insane that you wouldn’t take 15 minutes to get to know who your kids influencers are, but you do you.