Here’s a little thought experiment: If someone offered you a magical pill that could keep you healthy and fit and you never had to work out again, would you take it?

If the answer is yes, then it’s because while you may like the results of working out; deep down you know the actual act of working out fucking sucks. If such a pill existed, you wouldn’t keep lifting weights or running on a treadmill just for the hell of it.

It’s fine to like the results of working out. Hell, I like the results. I like being healthy. I like not having heart problems. But I’m not going to fucking delude myself like a gullible idiot and say that what it takes to achieve those things is somehow enjoyable. Because it’s not. Working out is fucking awful. Just because it’s the only option doesn’t mean I have to pretend to like it.

Golly gee, you’re telling me that the reason I dislike the shitty activity that sucks and make me feel terrible is only because I’m forced to do the shitty activity that sucks and makes me feel terrible? You’re saying that if I trick my brain into thinking that the shitty activity that sucks and makes me feel terrible somehow isn’t shitty, doesn’t suck, and doesn’t make me feel terrible; I’ll somehow believe it? Sorry, my brain doesn’t work like that. It tends to reject blatant fucking lies, especially when they come from myself.

I’m sure there are people who practice self-flangellation that have convinced themselves that they like it. Doesn’t make it any less of a stupid activity that anyone with sense would recognize is fucking awful.

I bet you’re also a morning person who just doesn’t understand why people struggle waking up and being productive.

This is a fucking lie. I work out to keep my blood pressure down and I HATE it. Every fucking day I hate it. “IT wIlL feEL WeIrD NOT tO HiT tHe gYm-” fuck off. No it doesn’t. Every second I’m at the gym I wish I could be laying down relaxing. It also doesn’t get easier. Oh the workouts do, but the motivation to go? The awful post-workout routine of being exhausted and needing to shower but STILL having to cook and do all the household chores that need to get done that day? The desire to do ANYTHING else besides go to the gym? That does NOT get easier.

I’m so fucking tired of working out. If I didn’t have blood pressure issues, there is no way in hell I would subject myself to that BS 5/7 days of the week. There is no enjoyment from this activity. People talk about post-workout endorphins and I feel like they have to be bullshitting because I’ve never felt anything of the sort. Just a vague relief that it’s over… At least for that day.

I’ve seen this criticism a couple of times and I’m not sure I’m following. He was reading out the pledge that service members were taking on the field, you know the thing people do where the officiator says the words your supposed to say and you repeat them back? “State your name” is a pretty common thing in that when the person repeating the words is supposed to say their own name.

Are people upset because they think Trump should have said the oath himself, and thus, should have said his own name? Because that could cause some confusion with the soldiers repeating his words.

The only other thing I can think of is that people are just so pants-shittingly stupid that they couldn’t connect that he was reading out a pledge for soldiers to follow, and instead thought he was just reading from a teleprompter or a script and fucked up by not saying his own name. I really hope that’s not why people are upset because, holy shit how fucking stupid do you have to be to think that?

Hell yes, two joysticks! My biggest gripe with the first steam controller is that I could NOT get used to using the touchpad as a joystick.

Completely unrelated, but did you know that if all 4 tires are slashed on your car, insurance will typically cover the replacement; but if only 2-3 tires are slashed, you have to cover the replacement cost yourself?

To be fair, it’s a block of salt. Not only would microbes have a hard time surviving on it, but you can just run water over it and the top layer will dissolve away.

The one that constantly pops into my head is where I saw a woman making ceviche. Except she didn’t add salt directly to it. Instead, when it was time to start cutting everything, she pulled out a 10lb block of pink Himalayan rock salt from her fridge “that you can get from any specialty salt store” and used that as the cutting board so the dish would absorb some of the salt.

I was just stunned. In what way is that any better than just adding salt? In fact, it’s far worse since you have no way of controlling how much salt is going into the dish. And what the hell is a specialty salt store?!

Oh man they’re really feeling torn into! I bet they’re sitting in their mansions just racked with guilt and shame over how upset their constituents are! I’m sure they feel just awful for their staffer who has to reply to all the messages they get with a bland, form letter that addresses none of their questions or concerns.

He was also pro-slavery, but only for smart women. Many times, it was reported he owned women with facts and logic. Why he only wanted women with those qualities is unknown.

When I was visiting Houston, there was this restaurant called The Puddery that people were claiming had the best pudding ever. I went there and stood in line for a while before I got my order. It was, indeed, the best pudding I have ever had; but it was still pudding. There is a limit to how good pudding can be. So while someone could say it isn’t “just” pudding, but the best, most amazing pudding in the whole wide world; at the end of the day, it really is “just” pudding.

Why do I take long showers? Because I know in the future, I won’t be able to due to the water wars. And whether I, personally, take long showers or not will neither hasten, or slow, that timeline.

They’re going to be really confused and outraged when people start eating them.

Yea! It’s like they’ve never learned from history! If they ever opened up a history book they would see… Umm…

Flips through history book

Oh… Uhh…

Flips more frantically through history book

Oh… Oh no… Err…

Throws history book away

Anyways, the rich are definitely going to learn their lesson this time!

Right? I’m happy he won, but he’s just a mayor. It’s a step in the right direction, sure. But I think some people are vastly overestimating what he’ll be able to accomplish.

Give me a couple of million and I’ll do it.

Again. Total horseshit.

Skip out on the bad moments if you can! Are you crazy?! Live your life! Don’t simply choose to accept monotony just because it exists! You’re saying you shouldn’t try to actively avoid bad moments?! What the fuck kind of grin-and-bear-it nonsense is that?!

This comic reminds me of the same gripe I had with the movie Click.

The message seems to be “Life is short and precious, so appreciate every moment, because it’ll be over before you know it.” Which sounds nice, and sweet, and thoughtful, and is complete and utter horse shit.

There are times when life just plain sucks. When it’s boring or tedious or even torturous, and it would be 100% worth skipping if you could. When you have a headache at the airport and have just found out your flight has been delayed by 3 hours. When your tooth cracks at 4am and you’re waiting for hours in agony until a dentist opens up. When you finished a long work day and just want to get home and collapse, only to find the roads are blocked in a massive traffic jam. These are not fulfilling experiences. You do not learn or grow in any way, except to become more tolerant to enduring unfulfilling experiences. Of course it would be better if you could skip those things!

Everyone in the comments speculating, but no one bringing up the obvious: for the past couple years, 90% of the posts and replies in those kinds of subreddits have been bots. It’s become painfully obvious when you look. Dead Internet Theory in action.

Rogue One came out 9 years ago