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dantheclamman@lemmy.world to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 day ago

Kohler’s new toilet camera provides health insights based on your bathroom breaks

www.theverge.com

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Kohler’s new toilet camera provides health insights based on your bathroom breaks

www.theverge.com

dantheclamman@lemmy.world to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 day ago
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Cameras have finally found their way into our toilets.
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  • Archangel1313@lemmy.ca
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    55 minutes ago

    Ummm…no.

  • Flax@feddit.uk
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    58 minutes ago

    And they’re uploaded to their AWS server for analysis I hope

  • peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
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    21 hours ago

    The part that bothers me isn’t so much that someone came up with the idea that they could sell a toilet camera marketed as a health app.

    It’s that it made it far enough to actually be produced and sold. Which means someone tried to go the route of making it a medical device, was told “No” for some reason or another, but said “you know what, there’s still money to be made here” and they found people that had no problem making it. If they did have a problem making it, I suspect they no longer work for the teams making it. But because it’s here, they found enough people to go “ok whatever.”

    And that’s how we end up with the modern dystopia.

    • PeacefulForest@lemmy.world
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      38 minutes ago

      Nice username

  • TommySoda@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    There is no reason for a camera to ever be in a bathroom for any reason. And no matter what reason they can come up with there will always be a downside that is substantially worse.

    • Foni@lemmy.zip
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      1 day ago

      There is no reason for a camera to ever be in a bathroom for any reason.

      Porn, the reason ir porn

      • quick_snail@feddit.nl
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        6 hours ago

        Leave your interracial kinks out of this

      • shalafi@lemmy.world
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        22 hours ago

        I got kinks I won’t admit to a soul, but human waste elimination is on the opposite end of my horny meter.

        • pleaseletmein@lemmy.zip
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          20 minutes ago

          Even for someone who’s into piss, corporate sponsored non consensual voyeur should be a turnoff.

        • PattyMcB@lemmy.world
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          2 hours ago

          So… eating human waste?!

    • HubertManne@piefed.social
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      23 hours ago

      I mean a pinpoint accurate bidet that is assured of 100% clean. It does make me think of that little robot asking rick what its purpose is though.

  • toomanypancakes@piefed.world
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    1 day ago

    If I want to take pictures of my butthole I have a camera for that already

    • mybuttnolie@sopuli.xyz
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      5 hours ago

      the only real use for a selfie stick

      • PattyMcB@lemmy.world
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        2 hours ago

        Just be careful not to do the phone in the toilet

    • NoForwadSlashS@piefed.social
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      1 day ago

      This is where you advertise your onlyfans

    • dantheclamman@lemmy.worldOP
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      23 hours ago

      They say the camera points down, but that makes me wonder…what about the reflections?? Oh god, the reflections

  • borZ0 the t1r3D b3aR@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Nope

  • Rentlar@lemmy.ca
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    1 day ago

    Adult Swim pioneered this over a decade ago with SmartPipe

    • bss03@infosec.pub
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      5 hours ago

      For those OOTL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJklHwoYgBQ

    • wildbus8979@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      And remember, SmartPipe Kohler is definitely not a PDF file!

  • JasonDJ@lemmy.zip
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    20 hours ago

    I don’t need a video recording of my bathroom habits to tell me I need more fiber and more water. Or remind me that liquid bread satisfies neither.

  • DevoidWisdom@sh.itjust.works
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    1 day ago

    $599 intial cost, plus $70 or $130 a year. I’m happy that they are finding really amazing, break through products to offer us. Surely this is the continued excellence we can expect from the ai frenzy. Wow!

    • SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca
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      4 hours ago

      $599 intial cost, plus $70 or $130 a year.

      you can get patrons on OnlyFans to examine your poops and make money! Ask me how I made $2000 a month!

    • Rooster326@programming.dev
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      22 hours ago

      Wait till you get the AI powered shitter.

      • PattyMcB@lemmy.world
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        2 hours ago

        That I could go for. It might actually help people with special needs.

        This is just crap (pun intended)

  • beatnixxx@fedia.io
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    1 day ago

    GTFOH.

  • shalafi@lemmy.world
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    22 hours ago

    Or, and bear with me on this, we could educate people on basic matters of health. Crazy, I know! But what if?

  • chickenf622@sh.itjust.works
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    1 day ago

    Of fucking course you need to have their app to get any useful data from it. I certainly trust a plumbing manufacturer to have solid cybersecurity, and there certainly won’t be any data breaches of people’s poop data. When do you think we’re gonna get FOSS poop cameras?

    • pleaseletmein@lemmy.zip
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      17 minutes ago

      You’ll have to pay extra for added security measures.

    • PattyMcB@lemmy.world
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      2 hours ago

      Just wait for the leaked videos of people’s hairy bags and their turds coming out

    • quick_snail@feddit.nl
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      6 hours ago

      Maybe open a feature request for buttplug.io

  • fartographer@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Beep boop. That’s poop.

    - My futuristic robotoilet reluctantly watching me shit in its mouth

    • shalafi@lemmy.world
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      22 hours ago

      First solid laugh of the day!

      “Take it! SWALLOW!”

      <sad computer beeps>

      “WHARRGARBL”

  • HexadecimalSky@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Seeing the comments makes me think, what happens employers start using this sort of texh trying to optimise bathroom breaks or something

  • lurch (he/him)@sh.itjust.works
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    1 day ago

    maybe, if we turn it upside down, we can use it to unlock paired phones with sphincterprint

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