DES MOINES, IA — Jessica Djukanovic, a conservative wrestling coach, mother of four, and loyal voter for the “Traditional Values and Strict Legislation Party,” is reportedly “shocked and appalled” to discover that the very laws she helped implement are currently treating her life as a secondary concern to a non-viable fetus.
I disagree. These people are literally too stupid to think of any other scenario than “slut fucks a bunch of men until she inevitably gets pregnant, we gotta punish her” until it happens to them.