Asking a ton of questions, offering to sign up for things like store credit cards and then backing out at the last second or filling in the form in such a way that it won’t go through. Financing a large tire purchase and backing out at the last minute. Leaving a cart full of frozen food in a low traffic area far away from the freezers on a busy day. Putting items randomly where they don’t go. “Not understanding” how the self-checkout works, buying cigarettes and being shit at describing what pack you want. Getting to the checkout with a cart full of frozen food and realizing you “left your wallet at home.” Splitting your bill over more than one method of payment for a single object, with the last method of payment being a gift card you know will decline. Getting to the checkout and halfway rung up, being like “oh, I forgot something I’ll just be a moment” and then leaving through the garden center. Trying to pay with any coupon but one you know will work, not being aggro about it or anything, just bumbling through politely, apologizing constantly and looking embarrassed. Only purchasing things you know are loss leaders. The idea is to act like the sort of customer who already wastes their time so you don’t let on that you’re doing it on purpose to get at their employers, and so if they crack down on the behavior they alienate the boomers who act like that as a matter of course, only the boomers are way more rude.
And tipping generously and leaving glowing reviews for the employees and scathing reviews for management for overworking their employees. Under different names for each so management can’t retaliate. And never ever do something that might negatively impact a frontline employee without also harming the company’s bottom line, either directly or as opportunity cost. And absolutely never do this to a union shop.
Naturally, there’s a different bespoke list for every type of retailer and every retailer in particular. And it must be done one chain at a time. You want the company to sweat in the face of competition that doesn’t have you as a problem. You want them to get a reputation as the place with super long lines that’s poorly organized and full of people who waste everyone’s time. You want to turn them into what kmart was in the early 2000’s, so that they can become what kmart is today.
EDIT: Also waste the time of other shoppers. Stand in front of high-traffic items with your cart parked so that it takes your half of the aisle from out of the middle while “making up your mind”. Seasonal items are great for this if you time it right.
Another edit: And this absolutely must be organized, so that this happens with an entire movement of people against one chain.
Now imagine putting this much effort into getting someone decent elected in your congressional district. Don’t make life shittier for the wage slaves who have to clean up after your stunts.
My example was a different retailer, but:
Asking a ton of questions, offering to sign up for things like store credit cards and then backing out at the last second or filling in the form in such a way that it won’t go through. Financing a large tire purchase and backing out at the last minute. Leaving a cart full of frozen food in a low traffic area far away from the freezers on a busy day. Putting items randomly where they don’t go. “Not understanding” how the self-checkout works, buying cigarettes and being shit at describing what pack you want. Getting to the checkout with a cart full of frozen food and realizing you “left your wallet at home.” Splitting your bill over more than one method of payment for a single object, with the last method of payment being a gift card you know will decline. Getting to the checkout and halfway rung up, being like “oh, I forgot something I’ll just be a moment” and then leaving through the garden center. Trying to pay with any coupon but one you know will work, not being aggro about it or anything, just bumbling through politely, apologizing constantly and looking embarrassed. Only purchasing things you know are loss leaders. The idea is to act like the sort of customer who already wastes their time so you don’t let on that you’re doing it on purpose to get at their employers, and so if they crack down on the behavior they alienate the boomers who act like that as a matter of course, only the boomers are way more rude.
And tipping generously and leaving glowing reviews for the employees and scathing reviews for management for overworking their employees. Under different names for each so management can’t retaliate. And never ever do something that might negatively impact a frontline employee without also harming the company’s bottom line, either directly or as opportunity cost. And absolutely never do this to a union shop.
Naturally, there’s a different bespoke list for every type of retailer and every retailer in particular. And it must be done one chain at a time. You want the company to sweat in the face of competition that doesn’t have you as a problem. You want them to get a reputation as the place with super long lines that’s poorly organized and full of people who waste everyone’s time. You want to turn them into what kmart was in the early 2000’s, so that they can become what kmart is today.
EDIT: Also waste the time of other shoppers. Stand in front of high-traffic items with your cart parked so that it takes your half of the aisle from out of the middle while “making up your mind”. Seasonal items are great for this if you time it right.
Another edit: And this absolutely must be organized, so that this happens with an entire movement of people against one chain.
Now imagine putting this much effort into getting someone decent elected in your congressional district. Don’t make life shittier for the wage slaves who have to clean up after your stunts.
Never do anything that might harm a corporation. Got it loud and clear.