So I moved back to my city after 7 years where my family lives.
It’s been 2 years but I never really enjoyed people here. Mostly people I met were from my previous circles, family, school friends and their partners.
I always thought something was off and maybe over time I will figure things out but it was just not happening.
Yesterday I went to dinner with my partners friends and damn it was whole different vibe. As if it’s a different culture. I really enjoyed talking and was genuinely interested in next meeting.
Resparked my joy in meeting people and I guess I was with wrong people and there are people who are out there who vibe match with me but it’s so hard to find them.
My best advice for finding a partner is to first find a best friend that evolves into a partner.
that’s not how sex works though. people dont’ want to be friends with people they want to fuck, and they dont’ want to fuck people they are friends with.
and a romantic relationship requires the desire to fuck. so that’s why people focus on that first and foremost.
Many people marry for different reasons. To each their own. In my eyes, I married for my forever partner. Beauty fades and I want more than a bang. I want someone who’s brain will be my partner more than their body.
The “make friends first” method works for me for this. Yes I want to have sex but I don’t want my intimacy to be wasted.
I only read the abstract, but that appears to not be the case, and a majority of relationships start as friendships: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8892041/